Saturday, August 8, 2009

small-man syndrome



i used to work with a wise older bicycle mechanic named pops. pops knew the answer to ANYTHING you would ask him. he taught me many valuable things. pops has been in the industry for a long, long time, and seen it all. from being a pro race mechanic for a team, to the the doldrums of the dirty-ghetto shop that my professional shop once was, to mentoring heroin-addicted teenage interns, and even into the current track bike boom. for better or for worse.

pops once told me about a strange phenomena that really came to life today, the "small-man syndrome." although this phenomena exists in many other forms of human nature, i will further elaborate about small man syndrome, specifically as it occurs in the bicycle world.

small man syndrome occurs when a customer intends to purchase a bicycle, yet absolutely refuses to purchase the one that fits properly. this phenomena occurs almost exclusively in men (never women) of shorter stature. instead, they opt to chose one that is clearly too large, disregarding any obvious signs that they should be riding the bicycle one size smaller. some of these obvious signs may include:

1) the bicycle is a "nut-buster," meaning that the toptube of the bicycle cannot be straddled with the rider flat-footed on the ground, without the rider's private parts being smashed on top of the bicycle's toptube. this is often compensated for by:
a) tilting the bicycle to the side while standing over the toptube, or
b) standing on tip-toes, while feigning disbelief, as he is being told that the bicycle is indeed too large for him.

2) the rider assumes a "superman" position on the bicycle in order to reach the handlebars. since the height of the bicycle is proportional to the reach, a too-large bicycle frequently is also too long for the rider (unless they exhibit "gorilla arms," which is not completely uncommon).


today, a 5'6" gentleman came in to buy a cyclocross bike. the cyclocross bicycles we sell have a higher bottom bracket than their road bike counterparts, therefore it is not uncommon to size down when selecting an appropriate sized cyclocross bicycle for the rider. the man tried 2 different sizes, but opted for the too-large size, even though i advised him against it, it was clearly a "nut-buster," and he rode it in "superman" pose.

i didn't even try to stop him from spending $1,100 on a bike that was clearly too large.

why not? this was pops' advice that i remembered today. "sometimes, there is absolutely nothing you can could say or do to convince a man that he should buy the bicycle with the smaller frame." it would fit him better, be more comfortable, and be better for his body in the long run. . . but he doesn't want to hear it. small-man syndrome effectively encrypts any incoming signals containing logic or reasoning that would otherwise prevent him from buying an ill-fitting bicycle.

a good reverse-analogy is vanity sizing.